Road Not Taken
by Canaa
Summary: What if the events of Chapter 53, and those immediately preceding it, went a different way? What if Raito's conscience in those chapters was strong enough to change his plans? How would the road he didn't take change the future? Spoilers to 59, some LxR
1. People Asking Why

**People Asking Why**  
Death Note  
AU (though not especially divergent as yet)  
Spoilers through Chapter 38.  
Part 1 of **Road Not Taken**

The evidence just wasn't adding up properly. He could see why Ryuuzaki had been suspicious of him - he could see why Ryuuzaki was insisting they be chained together twenty-four/seven. What he couldn't see was how any of it could possibly be true. 

Kira... to be Kira, that was impossible. But why? Why would it be impossible? Raito's eyes narrowed. Because he had no memory? But L had already hypothesized that he and Misa (and if he was Kira then he had no doubt that she would be the second) had lost their memories somehow, perhaps in a transfer of power. This... there was not a zero percent chance of it being true. Raito knew this as well as Ryuuzaki did. So why had he immediately thought it impossible...? 

"Yagami-kun? Are you all right?" Ryuuzaki's voice cut into Raito's thoughts, and he looked up, blinking. Owlish, tired eyes stared into his from no more than a few inches away. 

"Aa." Raito nodded. "I'm thinking back over the case to this point." 

"Ah, no wonder you looked so serious." Ryuuzaki pulled back and gave him his usual sickly grin. "You get very narrow eyes when you're thinking." 

Sometimes, Raito speculated on the odds of Ryuuzaki dropping dead from malnutrition and him being called Kira for the death. That didn't seem to be quite zero percent, either. Fortunately, if the detective had lived this long on sugar and caffiene alone, he wasn't likely to die now. It would be a shame if Ryuuzaki died, after all - the man was clearly insane, but also absolutely brilliant. His mind was always working, always had the right answers. 

Except for two. Kira and the second Kira. 

"Do I?" Raito asked distantly. 

"Mmhmm." Ryuuzaki regarded him over his teacup. "...you're starting to get bags under your eyes, like I have. This is a good thing, it means your brain is working harder. Soon you might even surpass me." Tea - so sugary it was nearly sludge in the cup - vanished into Ryuuzaki's mouth with a slurping noise. 

"Nonsense, I just haven't been getting enough sleep." Raito reached up unconciously to rub his eyes. "I seem to be attached at the wrist to someone whose idea of sleeping is to blink three times in quick succession." 

"Sleep dulls the mind," Ryuuzaki announced, then turned back to his own work, typing furiously with both hands as he held the edge of the cup between his teeth and continued to drink. 

Shaking his head, Raito returned to his thoughts. 


	2. Fast Changes

**Fast Changes**  
Death Note  
AU! Everything middle of Chapter 53 and up Did Not Happen (Like That).  
Spoilers up to Chapter 53  
Part 2 of **Road Not Taken**

When his father started screaming about a monster, it took all of Raito's self-control to not leap out of the helicopter, dragging Ryuuzaki behind him. Somehow, he gritted his teeth and waited for those on the ground to help their leader. 

Mogi-san's sudden shout was even more concerning. His father was understandably stressed, possibly hallucinating from the excitement and his earlier wound - but Mogi-san? Obviously, there was _something_ there. As Mogi brought the notebook Higuchi claimed was how he killed people over to the 'copter, eyes wild, Raito looked around uncertainly for anything unusual. Other than his father, now being supported by two masked men who were probably Aizawa and Matsuda and looking shaken but well, everything seemed as normal as such a large-scale assembly of police cars could. 

Ryuuzaki's sharp inhalation on taking the notebook alone would have confirmed it, much less his following words, and Raito leaned over his shoulder to grab the book. 

"Ryuuzaki, it it true? Let me see that." 

The moment his hands touched the book, information flooded his mind. More than information - images, _feelings_. A mini TV in a bag of chips thrown out with the trash, just a minor expense in Kira's all-consuming quest. Names, rows of names, columns of names. More faces than he could stand, flooding past, each with a name attached, some with times, some with methods, some with detailed instructions. 

He realized he was screaming just a moment too late to stop it. 

Him, standing alone in front of his high school, looking down at black notebook laying on the ground. An FBI agent's badge, a distraught young woman's ID. The young woman herself turning to leave, with less than twenty four hours 'til her death. 

Hatred. Criminals made the world unsafe; standard justice could not keep up with them, could not punish them properly. People who tried to stop real justice from being dispensed. 

Rivalry. Disdain. Bloodlust. 

Kira came flooding back into the mind of Yagami Raito. His fingers trembled on the notebook. It was true - he _had_ been Kira. He could be again. 

He had to speak. He was losing himself into the feelings that felt only too easy. And yet - they were _wrong_. "Ryuuzaki!" 

"A... are you all ri-" Ryuuzaki began, watching him carefully. 

"Ryuuzaki - _quickly_." Raito ground out, before Kira could stop himself. "Do something. Something I _won't anticipate_. Please!" 

Large round eyes blinked at him. 

Just as he felt himself crumbling and his eyes closed in defeat, something soft and warm moved against his lips. 

Ryuuzaki. Kissing him. 

The sweet taste drove Kira back in shock, and Raito took advantage of the retreat, locking mental bars around the feelings, the images, even as the gentle kiss continued. It wasn't surprising at all that Ryuuzaki's mouth tasted of sugar and tea. 

At Watari's polite cough, Ryuuzaki pulled back. "Was that unexpected enough, Yagami-kun?" His voice was flatly neutral. 

Raito took a moment to breathe, to steel himself against the information he had regained. Finally he answered. "Yes. Thank you." Then he leaned out the door of the helicopter and threw up everything he had eaten over the past day. 

Long fingers caught his peripheral vision as the reached around to pull his hair out of his face, and between heaves, Raito found the ability to be darkly amused. He lost it again in a moment, but eventually, the nausea subsided, and with the Death Note gripped tightly in one hand, Yagami Raito straightened up and wiped his mouth on the handkerchief Watari silently handed him, then looked L straight in the eyes. 

The eyes that stared back at him were flat for a moment, then widened with apparent sadness. "I didn't know I was that bad," Ryuuzaki complained. 

Raito let himself laugh. It would probably be the last time Ryuuzaki said anything casual to him. 

Holding up the Death Note, he quieted, then spoke. "You were right, Ryuuzaki." He took a very deep breath. "I was Kira." 


	3. Apples

**Apples**  
Death Note  
AU! Everything from the middle of Chapter 53 and up Did Not Happen (Like That)  
Spoilers through chapter 56.  
Part 3 of **Road Not Taken**

By now, Raito was quite used to handcuffs. He'd read somewhere that extended periods of time spent in handcuffs caused nerve damage in the wrist and fingers; he was undoubtedly going to be experiencing the results of that sometime in the near future. 

Right now, though, he sat at a table in the Kira Investigation headquarters Ryuuzaki had had built, the Death Note - stapled closed - in his hands. Ryuuzaki and his father sat across from him, his father obviously trying to look stern and closed off, but instead looking merely miserable, and Ryuuzaki... Ryuuzaki was almost unreadable. He looked more tired than ever. Somewhere behind Raito, Matsuda, Mogi, and Aizawa sat in on the questioning. He could only imagine their faces. 

"So you're telling us that the God of Death - Rem, you say her name is - must stay with Higuchi?" Ryuuzaki's fingers twitched, then found a sugar cube and slowly began to crumble it into the cup in front of him. "And that unless Higuchi dies, you must remain in contact to that notebook to keep your memories as Kira." 

Raito nodded. His father flinched. 

"And that the two rules written in the back of that notebook are false, a red herring you had a reaper - not Rem, but one called Ryuuku - write, in anticipation of using your long imprisonment as evidence that you could not possibly have been Kira, and to keep us from destroying the notebook out of hand." Ryuuzaki's voice, too, was tired. 

_"Yes. Raito-kun shouldn't be Kira... but if he were, I would be in turmoil. Because Raito-kun in the first friend I've ever had!"_

When he was Kira, Raito had thought that Ryuuzaki had said that merely to manipulate him. During the period when his memories were gone, Raito had come to realize that Ryuuzaki respected and liked him, despite his constant suspicion. Perhaps that was why his refusal to change his mind had made Raito so _angry_. Now, he knew that Ryuuzaki had meant it all along. 

"Yes. I knew that without my memories, I would was to help you find Kira. When that happened, I knew I would end up touching the Note, and temporarily regain my memories." He held out his bound wrists. "Take my wristwatch off, please?" 

Ryuuzaki nodded to Raito's father, who leaned forward and removed the watch he had given to his son. "What is special about the watch?" His voice remained coolly neutral as he raised his tea and sipped it. 

"Pull on the time setting knob four times with less than a second's pause between," Raito instructed. His father hesitated, glancing at L. 

"Please do it," L instructed. 

A moment later, the hidden section of the watch slid outwards, and the scrap of paper inside fluttered to the table. 

"That's from this Note." Raito looked down at the table in front of him. "By the time we found the new Kira, and the Note, we would surely have known his name and face. I would have killed him using the paper, and then the Note would be mine again, and my memories permanently returned. Then I would tell Misa - who would have been cleared by the same rule as I - where I buried the second Note." 

"What did you want her to do with the Note?" Though the question was asked, Raito knew that L knew the answer already. He looked up, met hard, tired eyes with his own. 

"Kill the one called Ryuuzaki." 

"As I expected. She knows my name, then?" 

"Probably. The Gods of Death can trade their eyes to the human who holds their Note; with the Eyes, they can see a person's name in their face. The trade costs half of the human's remaining lifespan. I never felt the trade to be worth it. However, Misa did - and at the university, just before she was arrested, she saw your face." Raito half-smiled. "If you hadn't stolen her phone, you'd have been dead before they got the handcuffs on her. I was calling her to ask her what your name was, and then I personally was going to write your name in my book." 

"Of course." Ryuuzaki looked away, teacup still held in the air where his mouth had been a moment before. "I cannot believe how many times I have come close to death in this investigation," he murmured. A moment longer, and he turned back and sipped his tea. "So what went wrong with your plan?" 

Raito tilted his head. "Nothing," he said simply. "It worked." 

"It obviously didn't," Yagami Souichirou said, the first words he had actually spoken since he'd been informed of Raito's confession of guilt. "Why not?" 

Ryuuzaki held up a hand. "No," he said. "It worked. He got his hands on the note. There was no flaw in his plan." From over the teacup, his eyes were irisless blanks. "The flaw was in Raito." 

Raito nodded to Ryuuzaki as his father blinked. "Exactly. When I felt the memories returning... when I felt what I had felt as Kira... when I remembered all those I killed..." He swallowed convulsively. "I'd just spent weeks believing that these were murders. I'd come to regard Ryuuzaki as a friend, despite his suspicion. I... didn't want to go back. That was why I asked Ryuuzaki to do something that would surprise me; it broke the memories of Kira." 

Ryuuzaki lifted his eyebrows. "I'm glad I succeeded, Raito-kun, since failing would have meant my death." 

"You did an excellent job of it. I'm still confused why you chose the method you did." Raito's mouth crooked. "Sorry about throwing up, after. It was... all the people I suddenly remembered killing. Not even all of them crimi-" he cut himself short. "All the people I had killed," he repeated, without the addendum. "Not you." 

Behind him he heard whispering. Matsuda-san was saying something to one of the others. 

"My pride is pleased to know it. I am, after all, an immature sore loser," Ryuuzaki said, hunching further over his knees. "Like Raito-kun." 

Raito nodded. "...Yes." 

"And like Kira." 

Another nod. "Yes." 

"One moment." L leaned forward and poured his cup full again. "Are you thirsty, Yagami-kun? I am afraid we cannot remove your handcuffs, but I'm sure one of us could hold a cup for you while you drink." 

"No, thank you. I'm fine." 

Ryuuzaki smiled. "Indeed." A sugar cube splashed into his tea, followed by another. "In that case, allow me to free your hands so you can drink on your own, on the provision that you will not try to open the Note." 

From behind, Raito heard Aizawa's voice. "Ryuuzaki, you just said..." 

L raised one hand. "I know what I said. I also know that Raito-kun will keep his word, if he gives it. He - _is_ not Kira. There is no denying that he _was_, but that is not who he is now. And we shouldn't make him go thirsty." 

Raito carefully kept his expression neutral. "Then I give my word to not attempt to open the Death Note, or to use the scrap on the table," he said. His father's startled glance down at where the scrap lay, near to Raito's hands nearly made him lose the balanced calm in his face. 

"Very good." Ryuuzaki's eyes crinkled at the corners, a hint of warmth in them for the first time since the helicopter, and he set down his teacup. "I much prefer dealing with Raito-kun than Kira, by the way." He stood on his chair and leaned forward over the table, fishing around in his pockets. "Key, key, key... ahha." His long fingers quickly unlocked and removed the handcuffs, then poured a cup of tea for Raito before he settled back onto his chair. 

"Thank you," Raito murmured, rubbing his wrists as well as he could without letting go of the Note. After a moment, he reached for his tea. 

"So. The question is, what do we do with Raito-kun and Misa-san." Ryuuzaki wrapped his hands around his knees and tilted his head back, looking thoughtful. "Obviously, the Notes must be destroyed. But if we destroy the Notes, neither will have their memories. If they do not have their memories, punishing them is nothing more than a pointless gesture." 

Raito's father stood abruptly. "Ryuuzaki - some time ago, you told me to wait to resign until after my son was confirmed as Kira." 

"So I did." Ryuuzaki's head tilted to one side and further back to see Yagami Souichirou's face. 

"I would like to do so now, please. This is a discussion I cannot and should not be part of. My opinion is compromised." Eyes closed, Raito's father bowed sharply to Ryuuzaki. "I'm sure you can understand." 

"Better than you may know," Ryuuzaki said, eyes narrowing faintly against the lights glaring down on his face. "Very well. I will write a letter of recommendation to whomever you like, and apprise them of your immense dedication and usefulness. I believe you will find that your career is not on the rocks it might have been, having your son discovered to have been Kira." 

"Thank you." With another stiff bow, Raito's father turned and left the room. He did not meet his son's eyes. 

"I'd wondered how long before he did that," Ryuuzaki commented to the air, then addressed the three behind Raito. "If one of you three would like to join me at the table as the leader of the police in the investigation...? Ah, Aizawa-san, of course." 

The creaking of a chair and footsteps indicated Aizawa standing, walking past Raito to the chair just abandoned by the elder Yagami. He hesitated a moment, then lowered himself into it. 

"Where were we...?" Ryuuzaki twisted his arm behind his back and scratched between his shoulder blades. "Ah, yes, what to do with Raito-kun and Misa-san." 

"There is no question," Aizawa said firmly. "They must be tried. The judge will have to make the decision on their punishment. That is not for us." 

"Ah, is that so?" Ryuuzaki blinked down into his teacup. "I think you will find that the national leaders - especially those of Japan, who will not want it well-known that Kira was the son of one of their top police officers - desire this to be taken care of quietly. And there are other complications." 

"Eh?" Aizawa blinked. 

"Misa-san's behavior changed after her interview. Normally, Misa-san would have insisted loudly on being allowed to help Raito-kun, rather than agreeing to cancel the plan, and going behind our backs. Not only that, but she got the Yotsuba Kira on the first try - not impossible, but improbable. And how did she convince him she was the second Kira, anyways?" Ryuuzaki's chin rested on his knees for a moment. "If it were not for the fact that if she had somehow regained her memories - which requires access to her notebook, according to Raito - I would likely be dead, I would almost think that she was aware of her and Raito-kun's identities." 

Raito frowned. "It shouldn't be possible. I was the last owner of that Note, so even if it was somehow found and made its way back to her, in order to regain her memories permanently, I would need to be dead." 

"I think we should determine second Note is still where you put it, Raito-kun," Ryuuzaki instructed. "If it is, we should let Misa-san touch it, and question her. Will we have your co-operation in this? She will not say anything unless you are all right with it." 

Raito held up his hands. "Ryuuzaki..." He looked down and sighed. "At this point, it would do me no good to begin resisting the investigation, even if I desired to. Yes, I'll help." 

"Thank you, Raito-kun. I'm afraid I cannot promise any sort of leniency, but I'm sure you knew that." Ryuuzaki reached for the handcuffs. "I think that Aizawa-san, Mogi-san, and I should be sufficient guard for this. Matsuda-san, would you please go and keep Misa-san company? Do not let her know that we have obtained Raito-kun's confession, or that he has confirmed her as the second Kira. In fact, unless unavoidable, say nothing about the investigation. Talk to her about... oh, her career as a model; that should be adequate distraction." 

Raito finished off his tea and stood, allowing Ryuuzaki to handcuff them together once again, carefully tucking the Death Note under his shirt to remain in contact with his skin. "Ah... could we pick up some apples on the way?" 

Ryuuzaki blinked at him slowly. "Apples?" 

"Please." 

"Eh, why not? Reapers eat only..." 

"Thank you."

* * *

The clearing was undisturbed. Ryuuzaki watched carefully as Raito counted steps and then knelt to move dirt aside with a small trowel. When he unearthed a wrapped box, Ryuuzaki moved to kneel beside him. 

"I think it's still in there, Ryuuzaki," Raito reported, working on the wrappings. The top of the box lifted to reveal a black notebook, much like the one hidden under Raito's shirt, but with the writing on the front in some strange, alien characters. 

L hmmed. "Take it out of the box if you would, Yagami-kun?" 

Raito nodded silently and lifted the notebook free. 

There was no accompanying surge of memories. Inside his cage, Kira stirred, but that was all. Raito stood and looked around. "Any time now..." He fished an apple out of his pocket. 

"Ohho!" Ryuuku's voice came from above, and Raito looked up. "L caught you, huh?" 

The apple arced upwards. "Actually, I gave up." 

In midair over a branch, the apple stopped, and then began to disappear, large bites being taken out of it. 

Ryuuzaki watched, fascinated. "Raito-kun, could you introduce me to your friend? Hearing only one side of a conversation could get rather strange after a time." 

Raito reached over with the Death Note and tapped Ryuuzaki gently on the head. "Ryuuku, this is Ryuuzaki. Ryuuzaki, Ryuuku. The reaper who eats apples." 


	4. Reactions

**Reactions**  
Death Note  
AU! Everything from the middle of 53 and up Did Not Happen (Like That).  
Spoilers... eh. To be safe, say through 56-57. Yes, even though they didn't happen.  
Part 4 of **Road Not Taken**

KIRA, SECOND KIRA CAUGHT AND CONVICTED! 

Every newspaper spread the story; a man and a woman, names unknown, tried in private hearings and convicted of being Kira and the second Kira. They reported that the woman, the second Kira, had been sentenced to the gentle punishment of life imprisonment in exchange for her help in catching the Yotsuba Kira. The man, Kira himself, received no such leniency. The day of his execution would not be far, it was promised. On the television, every news station vowed to be the first to bring their viewers the identities of the unknown pair. 

On the Internet, rumour abounded. Most claimed the woman was the model Amane Misa, known to have a connection to Yotsuba, whereabouts currently unknown, and once before missing at the time when the Kira killings ceased. The identity of the man was highly speculated, but only a very careful few proposed Misamisa's boyfriend as Kira. 

In his home, Yagami Souichirou forbade the television to be turned to a news channel. The Asahi Shimbun was thrown away as soon as it was delivered. 

He knew. His wife and daughter did not, but suspected; how could they help it? Raito was missing, had been for months, and now Yagami-san had quit the investigation at the moment of triumph. Sayu spent hours laying in her brother's bed, doing the math he'd helped her on so much. Sachiko hid her grief and kept house, and avoided her friends' gossip about the identities of the killers. 

In the now abandoned Kira Investigation headquarters, L watched the news religiously. His part was fulfilled; he had found Kira, identified him, and brought him down. His eventual success could be attributed as much or more to the criminal's own sense of honor and justice reasserting itself as to L's unorthodox methods, but that didn't lessen the gratitude of the international leaders who had hired him. 

With no one to watch him, he lounged comfortably on the floor, the glow of his monitors feeding him the information that was his staple diet, moreso than food and drink. He'd been invited to the trial; it should have surprised no one when Watari had shown, cloaked once more in trenchcoat and a fedora pulled low, carrying a laptop. All the information he'd demanded as part-payment was being given to him. 

He knew the day. He knew the time. 

Now he only had to decide what to do with the information. 


	5. Choosing

**Choosing**  
Death Note  
AU! From the middle of Chapter 53 and up Did Not Happen (Like That)  
Spoilers up to Chapter 40  
Part 5 of **Road Not Taken**

Aber and Weddie were still in Japan; when their presence had been required once more, L (or rather, Watari) had no difficulties in contacting them. In just two hours, they stood behind L at his desk, where he once more crouched on his chair, over-sugared tea cooling in a cup near to hand. 

"Another job for us, L? That was quick." Aber rolled his shoulders under his jacket, likely to settle it more comfortably. He'd been located in a lady's house, and while he'd been told he could take his time with her, he'd returned to the headquarters with some haste - or so it seemed, as his shirt was on inside out. The tag glinted on a security monitor to L's left. 

"We don't have much time," L said, eyes fixed on his computer screen. "It's in two more days." 

"What's in two days, boss?" Weddie had been at a sumo event. L had never quite understood the sport, himself - not that he'd tried. From the sounds, she had removed her hat and was fluffing her hair. 

"The execution." 

Silence from behind him, then Aber spoke. "Kira?" 

L nodded, placing his hands on his knees, and swiveled his chair to face the two criminals. "Yes. Or rather, Raito." He reached behind himself for his tea. "It's a waste." 

Aber glanced over at Weddie, then back to L, fabric rustling as he shifted from foot to foot. "...Whatever you say. I'm not going to ask questions. What do you need me to do?" 

L stood and walked over to the printer, gathering up a pile of papers, his movements slow and careful. "Study these. This is the data of the night guard they have on Raito's cell; there are clips of his voice and movement on the disc in the CD drive of the last computer in the row. It is fortunate that he resembles his foreign parent more than his Japanese one; you two will look sufficiently alike that minor makeup will be enough to fool most Japanese." He looked over his shoulder at Aber. "I know acting is not your calling, but it is required for your cons; I know you can do this. Tomorrow evening, you will replace the guard as he leaves his home to travel to work. While on duty, you will place a knockout drug in Yagami Raito's water, then, using the security system data Weddie will collect tonight to avoid being seen, bring him to the designated place. After that... we will see." 

"Then I guess I know what I'm doing," Weddie said cheerfully. "I'll get started." 

"Thank you." L slouched over to Aber and handed him the papers. "Both of you. Weddie, I will have another task for you after you have finished scouting the prison block where Yagami-kun is held - we will talk about it later." 

"What will you be doing?" Aber took the papers and began to read through them. 

L's hands disappeared into his pockets. "Planning." He shuffled back to his computer and folded himself into the chair.

* * *

On waking, Raito reflected that he should have realized that the water was drugged. The flavour had been off, but he had simply chalked it up to nerves. After all, being scheduled to die in the morning for crimes you didn't remember committing was enough to put any sane human off their feed. Raito wasn't sure he _was_ sane, but he was apparently close enough for the insanity plea his highly unenthusiastic lawyer had put in to be void. 

Wherever he was, it was dark. He was restrained - _handcuffs, how familiar_ - and sitting in a chair. It was too dark to make out the walls, but he could guess that he was likely in the middle of the room. It would make sense. There was no noise in the background; no hum of cars from a nearby road, no sounds of life from rooms around. 

It was so quiet, in fact, that he heard clearly when footsteps approached, and a door slid open. Strong footsteps strode into the room behind Raito, a beam of light from outside the door shining around him, silhouetting him on the floor. His shadow was soon drowned out by that of the person who had entered, approaching him from behind without a word. 

There was some thing familiar about the shape of the shadow, and Raito frowned. 

"Raito-kun," the person - a man, from the voice - behind him said mildly. "You look well. I am sorry for having you drugged, but it was easier to get you here disguised as luggage than it would have been letting you walk out." 

Raito remained silent, head hanging down as though asleep still. The voice nagged at his mind - he knew it, he knew he did. He kept his breathing still and even, hoping the other would speak again. 

"Ah. Well, Raito-kun, there's something I want to ask you. Do you want to die tomorrow?" The voice was right behind him now, and he still couldn't place it. It seemed like it should be as familiar to him as his own, but the sound of the steps was unfamiliar, the shadow on the floor... 

The shadow on the floor! In it, his visitor's hair looked as though it had been slept on and never brushed. But the shoulders were straight, no trace of slouching, and the shadow seemed to belong to someone taller than he remembered, unless that were a trick of the light. Raito's eyes narrowed. Ryuuzaki had never stood straight. Was someone trying to trick him? _Who_? 

No, impossible. L's appearance was a closely kept secret. He, his father, Aizawa-san, Matsuda-san, Mogi-san, Aber, Weddie, and Watari - they were the only ones who knew, and according to L, all could be trusted, even the two - no, three - criminals. Misa didn't know that "Ryuuzaki" was truly L, despite all her time in the investigation headquarters. 

This had to be L. "Why?" 

Silence. Then, "You have a choice, Raito-kun. You can die tomorrow for Kira's sins - or you can live for them, and for Raito-kun's future. I leave it up to you. If you want to live..." Long, pale fingers reached around into Raito's line of view, holding a tiny object. "If you choose to live, take this in your mouth. Tomorrow, bite down and swallow it as you are given the first injection. If you choose to die - take it anyways. You might change your mind." 

"_Why_, L?" 

"Raito-kun can do far more than die," L answered, and his fingers pressed the capsule into Raito's mouth. 

The outside of the capsule tasted bitter, but the fingers holding it were salty and sweet. It was only after they withdrew that it registered on Raito - the taste of the capsule was identical to the flavour of the water he had drunk earlier, simply more concentrated. Raito used his tongue to tuck the capsule between his molars and the upper side of his mouth for safekeeping, and waited for the darkness to take him again. 

When he reawoke, he was back in his cell, with morning light creeping palely in through the tiny window high on his wall. 

Morning. 

No more time to decide.

* * *

"Raito-kun, you did not really think we could simply make you vanish entirely, did you?" With careful makeup lightening the enormous black bags under L's eyes, his wide stare was somehow even more disconcerting. The uniform he wore did nothing to help, though the way his hair stuck out from all around his hat detracted from the image. 

"But... it's someone else's corpse! That's disrespectful!" Raito hissed under his breath to L, sliding his own uniform hat on. 

"He was a vagrant, Raito," L said, voice reasonable. "A John Doe in a city morgue. It is the same if he is cremated in your place as if he is cremated as a nameless statistic. Now come, the time for the janitors to be here is past, and the patrol will come through soon." 

"I can't believe this," Raito muttered, picked up his mop, and followed L. 

On his way out the door of the prison morgue, he bumped into a suit-clad older man, hair beginning to streak with silver. Mumbling an apology, Raito moved to go around the man when he realized the fellow was staring at him. 

Then it registered, slowly perhaps because of the silver hair that had not been there just a few weeks before; the man was Yagami Souichirou, come to claim his son's ashes. 

Two steps ahead of Raito, L reached back and grabbed the younger Yagami's arm, pulling him loose from the shock. 

Somehow, they made it to the car where Watari waited without the stirring of an uproar beginning behind them. Safely behind tinted windows, L removed his cap and began to scrub away the makeup on his face. 

"He saw..." 

"He saw a janitor with hair the color of his son's," L said firmly. "There is a 75 chance that he will dismiss what he saw, when ashes are presented to him as yours." 

"And if he doesn't?" Raito asked. 

"Then there is a 12 chance he will report your escape immediately, an 11 chance he will wait to see if the Kira murders begin again before reporting it, and a 2 chance that he will keep quiet entirely." L twisted in his seat to look at Raito. "The murders will not begin again..." 

"Definitely not," Raito said quickly. 

"...And so there is effectively a 13 chance that if he does not accept that the ashes he is given are yours, your father will never say a word. That leaves only a 12 chance of your escape becoming known." 

"Like there was a 1 chance of me being Kira, 'Ryuuka'?" Raito asked, voice amused. 

"Exactly," L confirmed. 


	6. Improbability

**Improbability**  
Death Note  
AU! Everything from the middle of Chapter 53 and up Did Not Happen (Like That)  
Spoilers up to Chapter 59  
Part 6 of **Road Not Taken**

He'd had to tell his wife and daughter about Raito's guilt, eventually. There was no longer a way to avoid it, not with an official press release due soon, and the execution scheduled to occur the next day. To their credit, Sachiko and Sayu took the news well as could be expected. Both had cried. He couldn't blame them, for he had also, when he was alone. That his only son, his pride and joy, had turned out to be the master killer who had nearly evaded justice entirely... 

He had been unable to continue in the Kira investigation after Raito confessed, his emotions just too conflicted. His resignation, however, brought him no peace. The last time he had seen his son's face was in that room, shortly after the confession. He had never expected to see it again. 

He couldn't help but wonder if he'd be happier if he hadn't. 

There was something rather ironic, Yagami Souichirou had to admit, about using the recommendation he had acquired from L and the high salary which it earned him to track L down. Progress was slow, but he had information others who had attempted this did not; he knew Watari's face, and he knew that Watari _did_ know the identity and whereabouts of L. 

Finding Watari's identity - that was far easier than Souichirou had believed it would be. In a stroke of luck for him, Watari's face happened to be fairly famous. The great inventor and philanthropist Quillsh Wammy, well known for his creations and for the orphanages he had founded and funded all over the world... that this great man was the true identity of Watari was both a shock, and something to be carefully considered for the ramifications. Souichirou knew that he was not as good an investigator as either his son or L, but he felt as though he could trace this. He had clues. He simply needed to put them in order. 

That, however, was far more easily said than done. Quillsh Wammy's movements were difficult to track; a man with his sort of money could buy a privacy that was for all practical purposes impenetrable, even to the police. That, combined with a lack of genuine authority behind the search, had slowed Souichirou to a crawl. 

Sachiko worried about him, he knew; worried at how he spent all his time when not at work closeted in his study with his computer or out, sometimes for whole weekends. He couldn't tell her that he was tracing the footsteps of two men whom the world refused to admit existed as more than names. No, _three_ men. Souichirou knew that when L and Watari had left Japan, they had taken a third person with them. Sachiko's only son, and his - Yagami Raito. 

Kira. 

Souichirou couldn't have explained why he didn't report seeing his son leaving the prison alive immediately; after he'd had time to recover from the shock, he told himself that if another Kira murder occurred, he would go straight to his superiors. A few weeks absent of suspicious deaths later, he found himself struggling to remember the encounter on the morgue steps. Did he really see his son? That shade of hair was unusual in Japan, yes, but not impossible, and on the stairs, a person who had seemed to be Raito's height might have actually been a bit shorter, simply given the illusion of greater size. 

If he hadn't seen the "janitor" stop in the same sort of shock he'd felt, he might have dismissed the idea. That, however... yes. That had been Raito. He was certain of it. And if that had been Raito, then undoubtedly the janitor ahead of his son, the man with the slouch and entirely non-regulation hair sticking wildly out from under his cap, had been L. No one else would have _known_. 

The first thing Souichirou wanted to do when he found L and his son was to ask the genius detective one simple question: _Why?_ Why go through the difficulties and dangers of the investigation, only to let Kira loose again? 

On second thought, perhaps the question wasn't so simple after all. 


End file.
